Ah yes, "Localfirst" #web #development – because apparently, the best way to improve the internet is to reinvent it as a 1990s desktop app. Sure, let's all go back to the glory days of #offline #computing because, evidently, #cloud #services are just too mainstream now.
https://alexop.dev/posts/what-is-local-first-web-development/ #Localfirst #Retro #Innovation #HackerNews #ngated

Microsoft's 50th anniversary: where we learn that even reminiscing about the glory days gets a 403 #error. Apparently, #nostalgia is too high-volume for #CloudFront.
https://www.seattletimes.com/business/microsoft/microsoft-turns-50-4-employees-recall-their-early-years/ #Microsoft50th #TechHumor #AnniversaryCelebration #HackerNews #ngated

Ah yes, because what we truly need in 2023 is a #DIY guide to turn our beloved e-readers into high-contrast #GPS devices. Why use an actual GPS when you can awkwardly fumble with your Kindle’s browser and a cascade of apps on your phone? It's like trying to navigate using a magnifying glass and a sundial.
https://www.instructables.com/Use-Your-Kindle-or-Other-Ebook-As-a-High-Visibilit/ #EReaders #EBooks #Technology #Humor #Navigation #HackerNews #ngated

In a world where apps are apparently lighter than "a React button" (whatever that means), the tech wizards have now unlocked the secret to cramming an entire app, a Rust engine, and 150,000 records into a single kilobyte. Meanwhile, mere mortals still struggle to load their email without their laptop sounding like a jet engine.
https://nuejs.org/blog/large-scale-apps/ #lightweightapps #Rustengine #kilobyteinnovation #techwizards #appdevelopment #HackerNews #ngated

OMG, breaking news: some Vietnamese banking apps are using private iOS APIs like it's 1999! Apparently, Thanh Nguyen's deep dive reveals what every techie already knew—developers cutting corners can lead to chaos . But don't worry, surely no one will notice when their banking app suddenly crashes mid-transaction.
https://blog.verichains.io/p/technical-analysis-improper-use-of #VietnameseBanking #iOSAPIs #TechNews #DeveloperShortcuts #AppCrash #BankingChaos #HackerNews #ngated

BREAKING NEWS: #Sweden adds "demoscene" to the prestigious list of cultural achievements, right next to IKEA meatballs and ABBA! Apparently, pixelated graphics and beeping soundtracks are now considered heritage—because who doesn’t want to preserve the epic art of making your computer crash?
https://www.goto80.com/the-demoscene-as-a-unesco-heritage-in-sweden #demoscene #culturalheritage #pixelart #ABBA #IKEAmeatballs #HackerNews #ngated

Ah, the "revolutionary" IMAP protocol, the savior of decentralized email communication...from 1986! Just what we needed: another tech blog post explaining how your dusty mailserver doesn't actually need a Silicon Valley overlord to function. Email is so cutting-edge, even your grandma's AOL account is impressed!
https://blog.lohr.dev/imap-introduction #IMAPprotocol #DecentralizedEmail #TechHumor #EmailHistory #SiliconValley #HackerNews #ngated

Oh wow, a 2023 #Java article using #ASM to dabble in tail call recursion—because who doesn't love a good #bytecode manipulation adventure, right? Pro tip: avoid #recursion altogether and save yourself from this academic exercise in "elegance."
https://unlinkedlist.org/2023/03/19/tail-call-recursion-in-java-with-asm/ #tailcall #programming #tips #elegance #HackerNews #ngated

Oh great, Elon is now equipping Cybertrucks with anti-protester force fields. Because nothing says "solving real-world problems" like turning your overpriced Tonka toy into a #fortress against imaginary threats.
https://deepmusk.com/ #ElonMusk #Cybertruck #AntiProtester #Tech #Humor #HackerNews #ngated

BREAKING NEWS: #Geeks #shocked to learn #Amazon listens in on Alexa! Who would've thought that a company profiting from #data might actually use it? Next up, the revelation that water is wet and the sun rises in the east! #MindBlown
https://ploum.net/2025-03-28-geeks-naivety.html #Alexa #Privacy #MindBlown #TechNews #HackerNews #ngated

Hold onto your hats, nerds! #Xee is here to revolutionize the thrilling world of #XML with a Rust-powered engine that no one asked for. Apparently, Martijn Faassen spent two years crafting this masterpiece, because what could be more exhilarating than reinventing the wheel with #programming languages nobody wants to remember?
https://blog.startifact.com/posts/xee/ #Rust #Revolution #Humor #Tech #News #HackerNews #ngated

Oh joy, another deep dive into why #Amazon might not sell your favorite banned book. This opus, penned by a small army of authors, promises to save us from the #dystopia of unregulated free expression by reminding us that you can always buy your subversive #literature at the other massive online retailer.
https://citizenlab.ca/2024/11/analysis-of-censorship-on-amazon-com/ #BannedBooks #FreeExpression #HackerNews #ngated

Ah yes, another brave soul trying to decode Rust's #dynamic #dispatch, armed only with a "novice" badge and a half-eaten sandwich. Just wait until they discover "ownership" and "borrowing"—RIP their sanity.
https://alschwalm.com/blog/static/2017/03/07/exploring-dynamic-dispatch-in-rust/ #Rust #Programming #Ownership #Borrowing #Novice #HackerNews #ngated

GitHub's latest buzzword soup—'Gatehouse'—mixes #RBAC, #ABAC, and #ReBAC into a Rusty casserole of confusion . Promising async-friendly code like a vitamin commercial promises eternal youth, but only time will tell if it’s a miracle or just another overhyped tech smoothie .
https://github.com/thepartly/gatehouse #GitHub #Gatehouse #Rust #HackerNews #ngated

Oh, #Safari, the knight in shining armor of browsers! This article bravely suggests Safari for #privacy like recommending a paper bag for a spacesuit. Privacy wizards out there must be trembling with laughter.
https://matanabudy.com/achieving-great-privacy-with-safari/ #Browser #Humor #KnightInShiningArmor #PrivacyWizards #SpacesuitRecommendations #HackerNews #ngated

Breaking news: California AG warns #23andMe users that their DNA might be cheaper than a Google Translate subscription! Apparently, your genetic code could be a hot commodity, but remember, the translation might not be accurate.
https://oag.ca.gov/news/press-releases/attorney-general-bonta-urgently-issues-consumer-alert-23andme-customers #CaliforniaAG #DNAdata #GeneticPrivacy #HotCommodity #TranslationHumor #HackerNews #ngated

"Oh joy, another #language showdown: Zig's 'comptime' #magic is now crashing Rust's crab party. Because obviously, what the world really needed was a #syntax #battle royale in the world of compiled languages. "
https://crates.io/crates/crabtime #Zig #Rust #showdown #HackerNews #ngated

In a world where boxers become grill salesmen, George Foreman's passing leaves us wondering if the grilling industry will ever recover from this tragic loss. Now who will remind us that we can burn our food indoors without setting off the smoke detectors?
https://variety.com/2025/tv/news/george-foreman-boxer-infomercial-star-dies-1236345523/ #boxersgrills #GeorgeForeman #legacy #grillingindustry #indoorcooking #foodburning #HackerNews #ngated

In a move that screams "because we can", #Ubuntu plans to #swap out tried-and-true #GNU utilities for shiny #Rust alternatives. Who needs decades of #stability when you can have the thrill of rewriting everything in the latest #trendy language?
https://lwn.net/SubscriberLink/1014002/580b8750bf02cf41/ #language #HackerNews #ngated

Ah, the #retro allure of yet another Game Boy emulator, now with the added complexity of #Rust and a side dish of #GitHub buzzwords. Because why simply relive childhood #nostalgia when you can do it through a maze of #tech #jargon and digital pretension?
https://github.com/smparsons/retroboy #gaming #emulators #HackerNews #ngated